I’m not really in the business of giving advice about love, but it’s Valentine’s Day and it feels obligatory to acknowledge that.
Late last week I was talking someone through a job offer decision. The new role was more money, interesting work, and a manager who promised to champion this person for a promotion within 6 months. The current role was understaffed with more turnover coming, a burnout position for sure, with an unsupportive boss who’d flatly refused to match the other offer. (In context — within a corporation you’ve heard of who has recently announced significant layoffs, so having these choices at all means this person felt lucky.) It seems like an easy decision, so I was curious to uncover what made it feel like a dilemma for this client.
The client was thinking about loyalty — to the mission and goals of their current team, to the organization, and to a belief about how long a responsible person should stick with a role before leaving. As with so many work decisions, the hard parts are about identity and character. What kind of people we are, or want to be.
I think loyalty and love are admirable parts of our character that can confuse and mislead us when we direct them at organizations rather than people. Is it possible to love an organization? I think so. I’ve felt something like love for institutions I’ve been connected to.
But they can’t love you back, and you might get your heart broken if you expect that.
